Mamma Mia!!

First I think it is totally unfair that Mother’s Day falls in mid May. Mid May is when all hell breaks loose at my house. The end of the school year!! This is when we are scrambling to get end of year projects complete. This is when we usually discover dozens of missing assignments that must be completed by my 2e guy. This is when all the ballet recitals, final track meets, and field trips occur. My heart rate just went up thinking about the oodles of kid related stuff I need to micro manage today alone. I think a dude must have come up with the mid-May thing! I propose Mother’s Day be moved to July 24^th! That is a time when things are quiet, no school stress, no activities – a real time to enjoy a holiday just for me!

But, I can’t change dates and calendars! So I’ve decided to write a blog about what real moms want for Mother’s Day. Well, at least what this outta the box mom wants anyway!

1) A day free of fighting, bickering, brawling and bitching! PERIOD!

2) A clean house. Top to bottom including blinds, all bathrooms, and the garage! BAM!

3) A beautiful, manicured, poop free yard with perfect perennials, blooming trees and a brand new chaise lounge with drink holder! HINT HINT!

4) A laundry and dishes fairy! FOREVER!

5) A day with no bags/dark circles under my eyes, no crow’s feet, and NO GRAVITY!

6) A day free of extended family drama! DISFUNCTION be gone!

7) Brunch AND dinner out (reference #4 dishes fairy will be busy)!

8) TIME TIME TIME!! Books are piling up, nails are a hot mess, and mountains are waiting to be climbed!

9) Homemade cards and gifts! CAVEAT – they have to be honest and thoughtful and not finger painted with peanut butter on the sliding glass door!

10) UNPLUGGED! No computers, iPhones, or iPads to waste the day away!!

11) FUN! Inflatable footbaths, Twinkies and other assorted items purchased at Walgreens on Sunday morning will be accepted AND THEN regifted in mid-JUNE!!

Cheers and happy mom’s day!

 

 

Psych!?!

I’ve been told, on paper, my child has an IQ in the gifted range. He also has some learning struggles that make life hard.

I do on somedays, wonder if perhaps we got someone elses results from the testing psychologist — and perhaps the universe is playing a very long, drawn out trick on us.

Smart on paper, not so smart in school. Brilliant mind, terrible student. Creative thinker, scattered and unorganized backpack/existence. Can I be the only parent who feels this way?

We’ve entered high school – where, supposedly everything now really counts. My guy isn’t quite there yet. It doesn’t seem important enough to him. Will it ever be important enough?

I encourage, I follow up, I gently remind – I NAG! No effect. Will he ever be self motivated enough? I told my husband just yesterday – we have to let it go. He just might be a late bloomer. He just may be one of those smart kids who starts in community college until he figures it out.

All I know is I’m tired, confused, and patiently waiting for that light bulb to go off in my Edison kid’s brain. I swear,  it’s there – just enough brilliance to WANT to turn in homework!

I have a piece of paper – shit, a whole file cabinet full of documents that tell me to be patient. Apparently the road less traveled doesn’t have a roadmap, an iPhone app, or even a freakin’ light post.

If you’ve read this far, I appreciate you putting up with my little rant of the week. Cheers!

Overheard quotes in my day…

I used to post various bits of stuff I overheard throughout my day and life as status updates on Facebook. They were always completely truthful and only paraphrased if I didn’t write them down exactly as they were occurring. If they are good enough to be classified as “overheard quote of the day…” they are always worthy of sharing.  I have taken this fly on the wall habit of mine even further and started a quote board above my desk. Here are a few of my favorites:

Husband, “We are out of white bread! How can I eat a sandwich on cardboard (aka: whole grain bread).” Me, “Eating white bread is essentially like having a sandwich made out of a Twinkie!” Husband, “Oooooh, um, great idea!” (insert eye roll) You can lead a horse to water, but…

Geeky son, “Mom, can I buy the family game of competitive bioengineering?” Smart kid’s rock!

Daughter, “Mom, the dog has something hanging off her butt.”  Me (everytime), “Go tell your father!” Jobs based on gender are sometimes good!

While riding in an elevator with incredibly sweet girl with Cerebral Palsy I say, “Well, if we get stuck at least we know we are with people we like.” Sweet girl with CP to other paraprofessional in elevator, “I’d eat you first!” Best job ever!

Pilates instructor to me over the phone (prior to actually seeing me), “Pilates is amazing. It will make you longer and leaner.” Upon meeting me she now says, “pilates will make your muscles longer and leaner… and she jumps out of the way from one of my legs in a leg extension!”

Teenage daughter, “I love you!” Me, “Ohhhh, I love you too!” Daughter, “Uh, I was talking to the dog.” ARG!

And, the always in use, always perfect, “Don’t poke the bear!” Step away slowly from moody teenagers.

Enjoy and keep an ear out!

 

Zoo?

The family bird whisperer

me·nag·er·ie
noun 1. a collection of wild or unusual animals, especially for exhibition.

I grew up with pets. At various times we had guinea pigs, hamsters, cats, dogs – even the neighborhood dog would stop by once or twice a day as she got older (and more forgetful).  It only seemed natural that I, too as an adult, would have pets in my home. Many pets indeed.

There was a year or more where our “zoo” was pretty full and varied. We had, I swear, a snake, bearded dragon, fish, hamster, two guinea pigs and two dogs. My kids would say, “can we get a….” and I would stop them and say, “Nope, the zoo is currently full! Any more creatures and we will have to start charging admission.” I think they actually thought that would be a good source of income to expand the zoo even more. Yup, that’s where smart kids go with boundaries!

Like the Lion King, insert chorus from the Circle of Life, animals have shorter life spans than their humans. Over the last few years we lost many a fish — some ate each other (Mollys do that btw!), some literally jumped out of the aquarium and were found dried up on the carpet, and some just floated to the top.  Our very sweet, rescue beardie passed on for unknown reasons. Our elderly guineas (Violet and Sunny) went on to higher hay piles after a record breaking life span. Of course our many hamsters died under various natural and suspicious circumstances. (see older blog posts for details!) The saddest loss, for me anyway, was the loss of our 11 year old lab mix Lucy. After she passed the kids asked right away when we would get another dog. My heart was still healing and I wasn’t ready to bring another dog into the house. So, the answer for a long time was nope, not yet.

More than two years have passed and we discovered our Lab/Aussie mix, April, may actually need a buddy. Her territorial side makes regular dog stuff challenging. Or, perhaps, she is just a little “off” for a dog. These “quirks” were amplified when we dogsat a neighbor’s 90 pound, gentle giant labrador named Porter. April needs to be coaxed outdoors to do her business. We actually think she is holding out for a big walk most days. April needs to be coaxed into eating her breakfast and dinner. Again, we think she stages hunger strikes until she gets a big walk. Did I mention how much exercise it takes to calm the brain of an Australian Sheppard? There is a reason the majority of dogs at shelters are Aussie/Blue Healer/Border Collies/Herders! They are smart! Very smart! They also require tons of exercise and a purpose/job to be happy. When our April doesn’t get all of this and more she gets antsy, barky and then she stages potty and eating strikes. I’ve always said she needs her own private herd of sheep. She is ours, we love her and we do our best to keep her stimulated. SOOOOO, enter Porter. Big, gentle lab who is April’s polar opposite. Low maintenance dog meet high maintenance dog. Here is the kicker. Porter goes out to do his business; April follows and does her business right on top of his business… sometimes right on top of poor Porter! Porter eats his kibble… April eats her kibble! We discovered she needs another dog in her territory to be normal! Yes, “normal” is not a word often used in this house – go head LOL!

I know there seems to be a simple solution to this problem. Go get another dog! Well, I think I’m ready, but only 2 out of my 3 children are on board. We are thinking a 2 year old shelter pooch would be perfect. My girls are excited, scouring local websites for available dogs to adopt. The problem: number one son is NOT on board. He says we need a bird. Over and over and over – bird, no dog! We have explained to him that years ago we did a lot of research and seriously considered a bird. During that research (and visits to rescue organizations) discovered dear old mom is allergic to most bird dander. We also discovered that birds are too smart and require more than we can give. And, they can live a very long time. Not to mention a bird will not complete April’s yin need for a yang! We have had this very rational conversation including bar graphs and pie charts explaining why a bird is not right for us. His very rigid response on most days is, “no dog – BIRD!”

This has created quite a conundrum for me. Perhaps I can just go out and find my perfect dog friend and pretend he was a stray in our yard – ya know, he found us??

We have a little time to think about it and try to sway our one outlier. I’m thinking of resorting to bribery. I told the girls if we can all be in agreement the best time to bring a new dog into the house is when I am done working for the summer in late May.

Maybe we can compromise and find a bird/dog/housecleaner/gardener/wine pourer???

A rant sprinkled with a dash of venting

 

I write about my children, my life, my photography, and my observations on everything around me. Lately I’ve been spending more time focusing on photography – as it seems my brain is either in writing mode or photography mode. There are days when one seems so much easier than the other. I can honestly say both sometimes come very easy, and then on other days torture me to no end. I believe the mind of a creative person is made up of rubber bands pulling and tugging at the heart, questioning ability, and on a good day inspiring confidence.

In order to learn, grow and feel supported I read many blogs on special education, gifted education, creative education, etc.  “The more you read, the more you know, the more you know the more places you will go” ala Dr. Seuss! I live it, I breath it, I share it!

I almost always feel supported in my small community of “folks in the know!” We share links, speak the same language and genuinely want to understand our children, the children we support and what the future holds for them.

Then there are those days where I encounter someone “out of the know” who doesn’t want to “be in the know” and crushes my spirit like a grape. And, makes me feel as if everything I’ve done to support my child has been looked down upon, judged, and even been the subject of family jokes. I recently read an entry in the blog Laughing at Chaos called, I DON’T brag about my gifted kid where Jen wrote about her struggles when she encounters folks essentially “not in the know” about OUR kids. The blog was honest, direct and I immediately empathized with her. She wrote about how being gifted/twice exceptional is no more about parenting than eye color. She wrote about how being gifted/twice exceptional is about WIRING, not manners. She wrote about how sometimes it’s inspiring and other days it SUCKS, is EXHAUSTING and is HARD! I could have added there are also days I am jealous of those parents with neurotypical children.  Sometimes I secretly pray for “average.” And, there are also plenty of days when I roll my eyes at those same parents and wonder if they have any idea how easy they have it. Shit, I could have written this blog – I wish I had!

Please don’t misinterpret. Every moment of frustration in my home is ALWAYS quickly replaced by moments of inspiration. I’ve been known to whisper to myself like Brick from the TV show The Middle, “we just need to get him to college! College!” I wouldn’t trade my children for anything. When I read something as honest and great as “I DON’T brag about my gifted kid,” I generally hit “LIKE”, “SHARE” and spread the word because I know if it struck a chord with me, it will strike a chord with others I know.

And then, down comes the boot, crush, smash, obliterate. I received feedback saying, “just the act of sharing this post means you are bragging about your child.” And, “just using the word gifted means you are bragging about your child.” These responses immediately told me the respondent didn’t even read the article because it was about everything BUT bragging. My response was a gentle, “I encourage you to read the article before you judge me.” No response. End of discussion.

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve been fighting this battle for years. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him empathize with what he won’t understand.

Thanks for letting be vent, rant, bitch and moan. I feel better now.

Please take time out of your day to read Laughing At Chaos, the blog I referenced in this blog, at www.laughingatchaos.com. She is also on Facebook. Like her!! The blog mentioned above can be found at: http://laughingatchaos.com/2012/02/01/i-dont-brag-about-my-gifted-kid/

Peace!

 

52 photos/52 weeks 2011/12

Week 27: Macro. Close up of a silk scarf with iridescent sequins.

Week 26: Warm!

We are half way through the 52 photographs in 52 weeks project! This week’s theme is warm. I just bought a brand new camera with amazing ISO ranges — so it seemed appropriate to photograph an indoor light fixture in the evening hours. I think it is very warm! Enjoy!

tall tales

I am tall. It’s a fact. I am very tall actually. I am officially six foot even in bare feet, soaking wet. I’m even tall for a dude! In my head I don’t feel tall – until, of course, I see myself in photographs with average sized friends. I have actually said, “am I really THAT tall?” Friends always respond, uh yeah! Odd!

Not being average is a strange place to be sometimes. I’d like to say being really tall puts me on the extraordinary side of the bell curve, but I don’t think stature really works that way. Well, unless you are the president of the United States – they are always tall!

In school I remember being in the back row in every single class photograph. I was always last in line when we arranged ourselves shortest to tallest. And, I often had to remind people how old I was – as did my mother. “Really, she is only nine!”

Being tall and being a natural observer has put me in some amusing situation. On more than one occasion a sales clerk, while busy with my transaction, has handed me change and said, “Have a nice day, SIR!” I always laugh when that happens because when I respond in my feminine, “thank you, you too,” the sales clerk is startled, embarrassed and apologizes profusely. I find this quite amusing.

One day while shopping at the grocery store a sweet, elderly lady looked up at me and asked if I could help her reach a top shelf with her favorite canned vegetable on it. I was clearly the answer to her prayers that day in aisle 7. The item was on sale, so she needed a dozen cans and couldn’t reach. I giggled and asked if she could help me reach the flour on the bottom shelf. She winked back at me.

Being very tall also means having larger than average feet. My response to this has always been, “well, if they were any smaller I’d surely tip over!” I am forever grateful to Nordstrom Rack for carrying women’s shoes up the ungodly size of 14. TWO whole sizes larger than my enormous paws! One day while shopping the sale rack for shoes, a salesperson came by and asked if I needed any help. I giggled as I perused all the 12DDDD crazy wide shoes. I am a 12narrow, which is usually available in three varieties – flat, ugly, or transvestite blingy!  Without thinking I said (out loud), “I feel like I’m shopping in the tranny aisle!” She, of course, gasped and giggled right along with me. When I was a kid I threatened to wear shoe boxes on my feet!

Common misconceptions about being really tall busted! No, the air is not cleaner up here. No, I cannot wear anything (most stuff off the rack is too short) – however I can wear Target t-shirts, flip flops and cropped jeans like no one’s business! No, I am not a fast walker, runner or biker. Actually I am crazy slow. No, my husband is not crazy tall too; he is just my height (actually a smidge shorter). Yes, I can gain five pound without anyone knowing – well my mother and I always can tell!

Many folks I come in contact with say, “wow, how tall are you?” I know they mean it as a complement; otherwise they’d snicker, point and scurry away! My response lately has been, “very!” This is usually followed by, “you are so lucky!” I think to myself, the grass is always green on the other side of the fence my dear. My dream as a seventh grader was to be 5’7” – I was already pushing passed 5’8”.

As expected I also have tall children. My daughter asked me why we are so tall. Without going into the complexities of DNA and Northern European heritage I simply said, because the world would be boring if we were all the same. She agreed! We held hands, walked to the bus stop and I reminded a child there that, yes, she is really only 9!

Week 25: Vintage

A pretty silver broach purchased for me for christmas. I do not know how old it is, but I do know it was found at an antique shop and I am not the first owner. I do believe that counts as VINTAGE!

So lucky my family knows I love old, sparkly pins!

Barn Study

This is a property about a half mile from my home. Two barns, a few open structures, windmill and lots of junk. The property is vacant, for sale, and in disrepair. With all of that comes a beautiful barn with two layers of peeling paint.. first green, then red. Many of the doors are hanging crooked from their hinges — some are laying on the ground. The property was originally a horse stable, but is no longer housing anything. Actually the barn is now home to a dozen or more morning doves (who scared the tar out of me!!) and many, many rabbits. Enjoy!

The entire gallery can be seen at the following slide show link:
barn study slideshow